May 7, 2008

It used to be that charm school was enough to provide the proper training and finishing touches for any young lady.

You were taught how to be graceful, stand, walk, carry on a conversation, eat, sit in a chair, get in and out of a car without flashing your silk panties, or for the daring, your vayjayjay.

In other words, how to be a lady - a charming, young lady.

And, while there appear to still be “finishing schools” around, classes are more specialized than general. At least my internet browsing indicates this to be so.

In fact, I just heard a tease for an upcoming news story on classes that teach one how to walk in the new stylish lineup of high heels. Whaaaaa? Really? I did a Google search, and here’s a couple of links:

• Learn to walk on stilettos like a pro
• How I learned to walk in high heels

Okay, if you really have to pay someone to explain to you the fine art of walking in something that would, undoubtedly, be death-defying to most, I say forget it. Unless of course, it’s for the circus. And involves stilts. Real stilts. Shoes aren’t stilts.

I want a piece of the market. Need some small rather useless niche area I can teach that nobody else has yet, but would appeal to a mass audience.

Let’s see -how to apply mascara without opening your mouth. Nahhh.

The fine art of holding your liquor when you’ve consumed too much and have to walk in those fuckin’ high heels?

YEAH! Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner.  I’ll even supply the alcohol.

Come on down girls.

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|  Printable version | Posted in reflections | Tags: current events, society.