January 6, 2000

There are two kinds of people - those you know, and those to be known. Which do you want to be?

Interesting, but what exactly does that mean, you ask? This thought popped into my head about a year ago, and I have posed it to many a person encountered - friends, family, acquaintances, and yes, strangers. The perceptions vary as much as the individuals to whom it has been asked.

Think about the people you encountered today. Now, think about the statement again. Every morning, you get up (or, at least you hope you’re going to get up). You go about your daily routine, intermingling with people from all walks of life - some of which you know. You’ll recognize a face, smile and politely say “hello.” Do you even know or remember that person’s name? No? The clerk behind the register where you stop every morning for coffee and a newspaper. Do you know his/her name? No? Wow - nameless with a face - what a shame!!! Why not? These are the folks you deal with on a day-to-day basis - wouldn’t it be nice to at least know their names? Do they know yours?

This is exactly the intent of the statement. There are two kinds of people: 1) those whom you encounter daily, and know either very little or absolutely nothing about - but can recognize by face; and 2) those you do know who are within your circle of friends/acquaintances, or who intrigue you to the point of becoming better acquainted. Which do you want to go through life being – the nameless face? Or someone remembered and greeted as you walk into a store, and occasionally passed along the street?

I once read an article about a professor’s teachings to his business-class students. One particular exam of his included a question requesting the names of staff members within the college whom the students encountered every day. All each student had to do was identify five of these people. To his dismay, he found they couldn’t answer the question without exerting a great degree of difficulty. They were able to recall the faces, but not the names.

The human race, in and of itself, is such an interesting species. What makes us fascinating is that we all have a story to tell; an experience to share. And, unless you take the time to get to know people, you’ll never discover the wonder of people. It only takes a second to say “hello,” and maybe a couple more to say “Hi, I’m Mary, how are you today?” That’s not to say you’re building a lifetime friendship here, but you’re stopping to let a person know they’re worthy of your time and effort. This applies to every one of us – no matter the status on society’s ladder. In the flash of a second, a life can transform itself 180 degrees and, as such, makes us no better than our neighbor. And vice versa.

Always moving about in such a hurry, we’re controlled by the time constraints placed on us both by society and ourselves. Intently focused on our own needs that we’re prevented from appreciating life - and its unique inhabitants. It’s as though we’re so entrenched in the rat race and fear being left behind. Do you ever wonder what it would be like if you actually were left behind? Would it really be so devastating? If only we could take a step outside of ourselves, and glance around at the hustle and bustle we call living. And, at the same time, search for the reasons why we can’t take a few stolen moments each day to enjoy life, and our fellow citizens.

Amazingly, we’ve reached a point in society where human interaction is becoming less and less valued, and impersonal communication more fixating. We’re losing the ability to converse amongst ourselves in the real world. Internet chatting is replacing live conversations. If you become bored with one conversation, you can instantly move on to another with anyone in the world. While it may sound exciting, how much fun can it be to sit in front of a computer for hours on end, talking to faceless individuals?

The World Wide Web has provided a means of connecting our universe; yet, at the same time, it has removed the intimacy inherent in one-to-one communication. Eyes are the gateway into the soul, and computers are both blind and expressionless. (eCams and “smilies” just aren’t capable of delivering the same effect.) Some would argue the virtual world is more exciting than real life. However; for the most part, the virtual world remains all fantasy unless you actually know the person on the other end. Really know that other person! Do you?

So, we’re back to the beginning again - those you know, and those to be known.

Here’s an idea. Tomorrow, as you go about your day, make it a goal to meet someone in the real world - whether it’s that clerk behind the counter, or someone in passing who intriques you, and share something interesting - even if it’s only an exchange of names. You may find you can enrich your own life by enriching the life of another.

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